In those days when a man took a liking to a young woman, he approached her father to ask for her hand in marriage. Due to the prevailing economic conditions back then, it took a long time for a man to become financially stable enough to think about starting a family. When he did, he looked for a bride who was still young enough to bear him many children who could help him work the land when he got old. So while the man in these cases could be in his thirties, the potential bride would often still be a teenager.
Inviting the man into their home, the young woman’s parents sat down with him around a table while she brought wine and four cups. After she had poured each of them (but not herself) a cup of wine, she listened while this man, who she was meeting for the very first time, described his assets, skills and other qualities that made him a desirable mate. A brief negotiation followed where the price he would have to pay as compensation for the family’s loss of their daughter was determined. It was called the bride price.
If the two men reached an agreeable amount all eyes turned to the daughter who had been listening intently to the entire discussion. She now had to decide if she would take this man to be her husband. If she turned her empty cup upside down, the man went away never to return. But if she filled her cup and took a sip of the wine, she was agreeing to become his wife.
At that point they signed a betrothal agreement, wherein the man promised on oath to return for the young woman when all the wedding preparations were complete. Now they were officially engaged and the relationship could only be terminated by a divorce. He went away to build a home for them on family property next to his father’s house. This could take some time, and the couple rarely met again until the father of the groom pronounced the newly built home fit for habitation. Only then was the wedding date set, and the man given permission by his father to go collect his bride for the wedding.
During this time the young woman was to watch and wait at her parents’ home. She and her bridesmaids had to maintain a constant state of preparedness, since the wedding date would not be revealed to her until the bridegroom actually appeared at her door to take her to their new home.
For his part, the groom would try to show up unexpectedly to surprise her, carrying her off suddenly “like a thief in the night” when no one would see them. The only advance warning she would get was the sound of his voice shouting her name and the blast of a ram’s horn.
When the bridesmaids discovered that the bride had been “spirited away” they would organize a great torch-lit procession, going throughout the whole town announcing that the wedding banquet was soon to begin. The banquet typically capped off a seven-day celebration during which the bride and groom were hidden away in their private rooms while the whole town made merry. Then they reappeared at the banquet to receive the congratulations of their friends and family, and their married life officially began. The father of the groom picked up the tab for all the festivities.
“You trust in God; trust also in me,“ He said. In My Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me so that you also may be where I am.” (John 14:1-3) He has sworn on oath to return for us when the wedding preparations are complete and take us to His Father’s house, to the place He’s been preparing for us.
That is beautiful.
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